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Say Good and Speak Kindly to the People | Sheikh McCarthy

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As muslims, we are encouraged to read the Qur'an and to think and reflect upon the principles that can be found there. We are encouraged to take guidance from these principles, to act upon them, and to use them to inform your life. This halaqah is about an important theme that runs throughout the Qur'an - “say good to the people” or “speak good to the people”. We must speak to people in a good way. There are two conditions that must be met for a statement to be a good statement. i) How you say it must not be harsh. Be kind to the people. ii) The meaning of what you say. The meaning should be good, not negative. Parents: Parents are to be given the highest level of respect by muslims, so use the best words and the best speech for your parents. The Qur’an instructs us not to repel them by speaking roughly to them. “do not even say oof to them”. Instead speak in positive tones when you speak to your parents. Use noble words and good words. Do not use harsh or dismissive gestures or facial expressions. Beggars: Do not be harsh with beggars. Do not repel them harshly; do not speak to them harshly. The Ignorant: How do you speak with people who are harsh or rude toward you as a muslims? We are instructed to walk softly upon the Earth. Wish peace upon them. Respond in kindness. (Editor’s note: your goal is to follow the Sunnah of the messenger of Allah, not the hates of Islam.” Take your manner from the Qur’an and those who follow it. Do not take your manners from them.) The people of the book: “Do not argue with the people of the scripture except in the way that is best.” Again, speak in positive tones using good words. Another important principle is that we will be held to account for the words of our tongue. Speak kindly even to people of low social status. Rasul Allah was kind and gentle to his servant. Anas ibn Malik was the servant of Mohammed, sallallahu alaihi wasallam, for ten years and he reported that Mohammed was never harsh with him. He never heard the prophet say “oof” in ten years. Naturally, Anas made errors over the course of ten years of service, but he was never treated harshly even when he erred. What happens when you train yourself to say only good? What happens if you cannot control your tongue? What happens when you become accustomed to using curse words when bad things happen? What happens if you get into a fatal accident? What will your last words be? “Oh, Sugar!” Train yourself to speak in a kindly manner on all occasions. Read the Qur’an and reflect on the principles that are expressed. Make the principles which guide your life and your actions. Question & Answer (Q&A) Where is the balance between harshness and kindness? How should we deal with toxic people? How do you deal with people who practice magic upon us? How do we cultivate sabr – patience – with our wives and children? Practical advice and suggestions regarding mobile phones Please remember to put your phone onto silent mode when entering a mosque or Islamic gathering. Allah dislikes it when we distract people from their prayer. The ring of a mobile phone is distracting. Choose your ringtone based on Islamic principles. Musical ring tones risk brining music into a place of worship. Similarly, ringtones based recitations of the Qur’an or hadith come with the risk of having your phone play those recordings when you are in the bathroom.

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