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Why Do Men Drift Away From Church?

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Why do so many men gradually disengage from church, while women often remain among its most active and committed members? In this episode of The Berean Workshop, Tolu and Mululi have an honest, unscripted conversation about men, fellowship, purpose and discipleship. Is there something inherently different about the way men respond to faith and mission? Or has the modern church sometimes failed to connect biblical truth with the real burdens men carry—work, finances, marriage, sexual temptation, responsibility, identity and the pressure to provide? The conversation moves from the creation account and the breakdown of God’s order in Genesis, to the men and women surrounding Jesus, Paul’s greetings in Romans 16, Jacob’s struggles, the fellowship of the early church and the practical armour of God in Ephesians 6. Tolu also speaks vulnerably about his years in church leadership, why he eventually stepped away, his concerns about discipleship and dependence on the Holy Spirit, and what God taught him through that season. This is not an argument for church attendance merely for the sake of attendance. It is a call for genuine koinonia—believers sharing life, burdens, wisdom and practical support as members of one body. Perhaps men do not simply need another church programme. Perhaps they need a mission worth giving themselves to, relationships in which they can be honest, and discipleship that addresses the whole of life. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 – Why are men less engaged in church? 02:07 – Women, ministry and the pattern seen in Scripture 03:21 – Creation, the fall and the restoration of God’s order 04:51 – Why men respond strongly to vision and mission 06:53 – What is the modern church failing to address? 09:00 – Tolu’s journey into ministry and church leadership 13:22 – Why Tolu stepped away from leadership 16:44 – Attendance, discipleship and the whole counsel of God 18:57 – The responsibilities and pressures men carry 20:25 – Jacob: work, family pressure and learning to hear God 23:50 – Koinonia: fellowship as sharing real life together 25:42 – Have Christians spiritualised practical problems? 27:39 – Lust, demons and the need to listen before diagnosing Timestamps currently cover the first 30 minutes of this 40-minute conversation. #TheBereanWorkshop #ChristianMen #MenInChurch #ChristianDiscipleship #BiblicalManhood #ChurchFellowship #Koinonia #ChristianPodcast #FaithAndLife #BodyOfChrist

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