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You finally get the news you've been waiting for. You open your contacts, scroll for a while… and put the phone back down. This video is about that moment: why loneliness can hit hardest on a good day, what psychologists call "capitalization", and three small ways to give your good news somewhere to go. What's one good thing that happened to you this week? Big or small, write it down in the comments. Chapters 0:00 The good news you didn't share 1:08 Someone to tell 4:04 What it says about you 6:05 Small things you can do 7:14 Closer than it feels Research mentioned (time in the video, then the source) 2:18 Telling someone about a good day adds to the happiness the event itself gives. Gable, S. L., Reis, H. T., Impett, E. A., & Asher, E. R. (2004). What do you do when things go right? The intrapersonal and interpersonal benefits of sharing positive events. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 87(2), 228-245. 2:36 People value good news more after sharing it, especially with someone who is clearly happy for them. Reis, H. T., Smith, S. M., Carmichael, C. L., Caprariello, P. A., Tsai, F.-F., Rodrigues, A., & Maniaci, M. R. (2010). Are you happy for me? How sharing positive events with others provides personal and interpersonal benefits. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 99(2), 311-329. 3:12 It takes more than 200 hours together to become close friends. Hall, J. A. (2019). How many hours does it take to make a friend? Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 36(4), 1278-1296. 3:20 Most of us have room for about five people in our innermost circle. Dunbar, R. I. M. (2018). The anatomy of friendship. Trends in Cognitive Sciences, 22(1), 32-51. 3:37 Four ways people respond to good news; only one leaves you feeling heard. Gable et al. (2004), above. 4:32 Loneliness as feeling disconnected, alone or in a crowd. Cacioppo, J. T., & Patrick, W. (2008). Loneliness: Human Nature and the Need for Social Connection. W. W. Norton. 4:42 About one in two U.S. adults report feeling lonely. Office of the U.S. Surgeon General (2023). Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation: The U.S. Surgeon General's Advisory on the Healing Effects of Social Connection and Community. 5:33 How people respond to your good news shapes a relationship more than how they respond to bad news. Gable, S. L., Gonzaga, G. C., & Strachman, A. (2006). Will you be there for me when things go right? Supportive responses to positive event disclosures. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 91(5), 904-917. 6:34 People appreciate a reach-out message far more than the sender expects. Liu, P. J., Rim, S., Min, L., & Min, K. E. (2023). The surprise of reaching out: Appreciated more than we think. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 124(4), 754-771. This video is for education and isn't a substitute for professional help. If a heavy feeling has lasted a long time, please talk to a doctor, a counselor, or a local support line. #psychology #loneliness

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